R.I.P to my common sense </3
I’m a sucker for making unnecessary playlists, with songs I don’t wanna listen to, about emotions I don’t want to be reminded of. That classic image of someone who listens to sad songs when they’re upset just so they can cry more about it, slightly pathetic but also very therapeutic. Everyone needs a cry sometimes or to eat their feelings in the form of ice cream (but I can’t write a blog post about that).
So, I’m the worst when it comes to romantic stuff. I always make playlists about boys I’m talking to (sorry ladies I’m too scared to approach you) and clearly by the fact I’m still single none of them has ended well. Then I get left with playlists that I just eventually delete but will still get flashbacks when I listen to those songs. I’ve unfortunately associated good songs with slightly tainted memories.
The next part of this process is after that awful “we need to talk” conversation when I stupidly make a playlist about it…because I never learn, and music is clearly a coping mechanism for me.
Some people put these feelings into art like paintings or their own lyrics or poetry or write letters to them (the previous two I have done before) but it seems much easier to me to simply create and delete a playlist than have to destroy something physical. Everyone has their own ways of dealing with stuff so each to their own, I won’t judge if you wanna burn photos of your ex because you like how dramatic it is.
At this moment in time, I have about three different playlists about being sad about boys, because there are too many different ways to separate my emotions.
(You can listen to 30-second clips of the songs below or the whole playlists are on Spotify)
The first is like a proper sad heartbroken one full of emotional songs for when I wanna cry but it’s also got some “remember this isn’t the end of the world” kinda songs so it’s a nice balance. (it’s also mainly indie artists bc that’s all I listen to sorry not sorry)
The second is the most recent which is more upbeat songs and it’s the longest of the three. For context, the songs are from about 2 years and 5 attempts at stuff that didn’t work out so it’s a large mixture of emotions and experiences. From tinder disasters to being ghosted, to unsuccessful relationships, to being second choice, to long distance, to never saying how you feel out loud, to summer romances, to being replaced, to cringey drunk messages, etc etc. Yeah there’s a lot. And I’ve managed to find songs that explain all of it, so I don’t have to say it out loud!
The last of them is split between an angry playlist full of emo songs and inspirational ” strong independent woman” anthems at the end, which tricks me into thinking I’m over something when I’m really not but fake it til you make it ey? I spent a lot of time on this one after my last breakup, was a nice little project so it is perfectly curated with the most accurate songs.
It might make no sense to other people why I’ve made these or why I’ve included certain songs in them but it makes sense to me and helps me to process and feel stuff better so it does have some benefits. I can assure you that I know quite a few people who have similar playlists or albums they always listen to when in this mindset.
I am most certainly over all of the people these songs are about who are no longer in my life but it’s that classic phrase of “don’t cry because its over, smile because it happened”. Every relationship, in whatever form it takes, is an experience and you usually learn a lot from them so these playlists are just reminders of the experiences I’ve had, good or bad. They’re just creative projects of mine about various stages of my life.
Feel free to let me know some of your favourite emotional romantic rollercoaster songs or album or link me your playlists so I can have a listen!!
ttyl Jess / x